Never Kiss A Toaster: personal gaffes

The Man and I went out to lunch yesterday. Now The Man, being the smart fellow that he is, started proofreading the menu. First he noticed that cheese was spelled as “chesse.” He gently pointed it out to the waitress, who was very gracious and replied that there were probably a number of typos in the menu.

While we were enjoying our meal, The Man found another questionable menu entry. Flagging down the waitress, he asked, “What’s togo coffee?”

“To go. Coffee to go.”

Now to be fair, it was a typo. There was no space in between to and go, but the sheepish look on his face was priceless. It was just one of those “gee I feel dumb” moments. Bless his heart. He has had coffee issues before.

On our honeymoon, we stopped at a little café for a bite to eat. The Man ordered the au jus sandwich. He was happily munching away when he managed, “This au jus is strange.”

I watched for a moment then replied, “You’re dipping your sandwich in your coffee.”

The sandwich wasn’t the only dippy one that day.

(Disclaimer: This message has been posted with The Man’s full knowledge and approval.)

S week is easy…S is for STAR WARS! And I’m late. I suppose since it’s actually T week, T should be for tardy. But I digress.

What to say about Star Wars? Everybody knows it, everybody loves it. (At least almost everybody I know.) Here’s a couple of my favorite Star Wars tributes:

First off, the commercial everyone is talking about…the pint-sized Darth Vader.

Genius. Somebody give that ad guy a raise.

Another stroke of pure genius…the Star Wars story set to a John Williams music medley…in four part harmony…sung by ONE guy! Love it.

Corey Vidal is the man. I need to go check out his other videos.

Getting back to T week. Besides tardy, T is also a nice fit for tongue tied.

This video cracks me up every stinkin’ time. This poor youth pastor is just doing his job, when—WHAM!—out comes an epic flub worthy of a lifetime achievement award. God bless his embarrassed heart.

Did you see his eyes bug out when he figured out what he had just said? Classic. Never fails to make me laugh.

Speaking of eyes bugging out…that reminds me of a similar flub The Man once made. We were in a small church in a rural farming community. The Man was on the platform, going through prayer requests, when he came up with this doozy.

“Let’s pray for Joe, who fell off his concubine and hurt himself.”

WHAT? Come again, city boy?

Yeah, that was supposed to be combine. “Joe” fell off his combine, as in farming implement!

Too bad that was before YouTube.